In Slow Motion

I'm dragging. I have been sleeping really well since getting back from vacation, but I'm tired. Last night I went to bed so early but I guess I needed it!

I am so excited for our meeting with our Adoption Specialist tomorrow morning! I wonder what she will tell us about the options we selected in our questionnaire. I hope she has seen our family profile, but I doubt it. I guess I don't know what to expect, but I'm not nervous. It's not like it is our first homestudy visit! But I wasn't nervous about that either, I just wanted the house clean as a whistle.

Last night, I went to get Bill's birthday present. I'm not going to say much about it because I don't want him coming over here and figuring out what it is. Unlike me guessing my birthday present right away, Bill hasn't even been close to guessing. I think he has given up now. It's gonna knock his socks off! I'm not sure how I'm going to be able to top this one for a while but it will definately qualify me for "wife of the year" status.

Bill ordered his TV. The BIG flatscreen TV. The one I have been saying "no" to for the last year. Well he found it for a very good price and this time I couldn't say no. He claims it has nothing to do with his birthday or for the Superbowl on Sunday. LOL! I came home last night to find our family room torn completely apart and everything pulled out of the cabinets of the entertainment center. The center part of the furniture has to be reworked to fit the new TV. I really don't want to buy any new furniture. That is not part of the deal!

The TV was delivered today. Bill had to go home to wait for it. He also got the cable company to come out and give us the new HD DVR today too. It's all set up apparently but Bill won't be home when I get there and I'm not going to touch it! I'd hate to turn it on the wrong way or something even though he bought an extended warranty with it.

I ordered the stroller and car seat on Monday night. It's being delivered on Friday in 2 big boxes. I'm very excited!!! We might still buy the Amby bed next month, but that's probably going to be it. Unless we run across some very good deal on clothes like what I already found, I don't have any other plans to purchase anything myself. My parents have offered to help us prepare and there is plenty of time for that. I feel much better having the car seat ready. You can't go anywhere without one. I am interested to see how it fits in the truck since it seems like our seats are at a pretty good angle and perhaps I will have to do the install with a pool noodle but at least I can figure this out now. We also got a seat protector to help with the compression and any rub marks. My truck does not approve a center LATCH install, so it will be done with a seatbelt. If I have to move up the driver seat, we'll have to consider installing it outboard, which I hope we won't have to do. The car seat doesn't look particularly long and it's not rated to 30 pounds like some larger models so I'm hopeful that there will be enough clearance. I know what I'll be doing this weekend!

I have not gone through all our pictures yet. I have to get the underwater cameras to be developed anyway. I should start going through those - hope I have some good ones!!

We're Back!!

We're back from our cruise! It was great and we had beautiful weather. The day we were in Belize, it was 100 degrees! We had a lot of fun and it was so nice to get away. I haven't gone through my pictures yet but I'm hoping I got some good ones.

The agency got our family profile and APQ on Monday. It was only mailed on Saturday! We came back to a message waiting for us that we have been assigned an "Adoption Specialist" through the rest of the process, all the way until we finalize the adoption. We have a conference with her on Thursday. I hope she will help me get over my fear of not being chosen by a birthmom. The design company is working on our digital profile and I hope to get a proof from that by the end of the week. Our agency has to approve our profile but after that, we are officially waiting! I can't believe it!!

I didn't buy a single baby thing on vacation! Mostly because everything we saw was very boy-ish or very girl-ish. Mexico and Belize had the cutest sundresses with smiling sunflowers but I didn't dare buy one. I told Bill it would be the surest way for us to get a boy!

I did have the aquarium baby swing on order and it wasn't supposed to ship until the end of February. What did I find at my front door yesterday? A wet box containing a baby swing! The swing is fine, the box was trashed so we HAD to put it together!! Biscuit and Harley were very suspicious of it sitting in the family room. They have no idea what their lives are going to be like.... Bill said we are definately decorating the nursery in the "Under the Sea" theme after all our snorkeling.

I'll have to give some detailed information about our cruise and post some pictures. I really didn't sleep well for the whole week because I didn't have my pillow and the mattress was a little hard for me so I'm very tired. I'm glad to have Biscuit back with me too! I missed her and Harley!!

Leaving Tomorrow!

At last, our cruise is tomorrow! We can't wait.... we are so ready for a break!

Our family profile was mailed today. It's off and out of our hands. We also got our draft of the home study report. We reviewed it and offered a few minor changes to some of our specific information. The report will be finalized while we are gone and in the hands of our agency. Everything that we had to do at this step is done and we can completely relax on our trip!

The pets are at Mike and Paula's. I'm off to pack my few last things and of course, my pink snorkel gear!!

It's Coming Together!

This is a great day!

Our family profile is in the envelope, ready to be mailed out tomorrow. The "Adoption Planning Questionnaire" is also in the envelope. I can't believe it - this was a huge step to accomplish and we did it! We can go on vacation and when we get back, it will be the start of a new journey for our little family.

Thank you Karen for reading over our profile!! I am grateful that you are so supportive and are able to help out in every way. You are our biggest cheerleader! I am confident that our profile reflects "us" in every way. Thank you!!

And we keep getting good news! Our social worker emailed me tonight that our FBI clearances came back. Wow! That only took about 5 weeks - not the 8 to 10 weeks we expected!! AND she is going to finish our home study report for us to review before we leave on our cruise on Sunday. By the time we return, it will be completely finalized and in the hands of our agency. I am so happy!

I have been keeping a written journal of our milestones in this journey so some day I can give it to Little Roo. He/she will see every step we did to find him/her! I hope it will be special for them as much as it is for me. I figure that I will not have a baby book that reads "Today I found out I was pregnant with you" and we might not have any ultrasound pictures, so this is the next best thing that I could think of. At least for right now.

Congratulations to Brock and Erica!! They have finished their paperchase for their China adoption!! Now the papers are off for translation and the waiting begins. I am so proud of them and I hope their wait is very short!

Car Seats Again!!

Remember my little rant about car seats and the bogus Consumer Reports issue about infant seat safety??? Well take a look at this!

http://www.cnn.com/2007/AUTOS/01/18/car_seat/index.html

Consumer Reports is recalling their original study of the infant car seats because some of the crash scenarios were tested at 70+ mph instead of the 38.5 mph that they really reported. My child seat technician friends are having a laugh over this one, but the damage has already been done.

This is a huge discrepancy and not just a little "error". It also seems completely irresponsible. If they were so wrong about the test speeds, what else where they wrong about? I bet the retraction will not get nearly the same amount of press that the first report about the failures did. I'm not talking about this any longer. The recall speaks for itself!

On a good note - We finished our family profile last night. It was really stressing me out over the last few days and finally I pretty much just started over. I was trying so hard to make it like the samples we were given, although I don't even believe they are real people. I can't take my own darn advice!! I just sat down and started writing from the heart and what I would tell people about us in a normal conversation.

Bill looked it over and made a few adjustments and my friend Karen also reviewed is for us. I was beginning to think I wasn't going to be able to get it done before our vacation but now I think we're going to send it out on Saturday to our agency. The development company can start working on making the proof while we are gone. One of the ladies in our agency is going to look it over as well and will suggest any changes for us to make. She has been doing this for a few years so we'll have to see what she thinks.

A huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders and I am ready for vacation! I haven't packed a thing and this is very unususal for me! I always have a list by now too - and I have NOTHING! OK, I did buy our underwater cameras and I got another memory card for my camera so I can take plenty of pictures. I obviously have my trip basics on hand - Purell and baby wipes! Tonight, I'm going to get cracking.

Heather's Foundation

Sent: Wednesday, January 17, 2007 10:15

Heather update 5 and foundation information!!

Everyone, the past few days have been disappointing for me because in Austin we have been having a huge ice storm and I have been stuck in my house not able to see Hebby for 2 days. I have spoken to Heather and she is slowly progressing but is in immense pain. Yesterday they changed her bandages in her room for the first time (normally it's done in surgery) and the pain was beyond words. It was a very rough day for all. But Heather's spirits are great and she is talking and alert and even beginning some physical therapy. We finally got to see her and visit with her today and to say that my sister is determined right now would be a slight understatement! On Saturday she will go into what we hope will be her last surgery to do the skin grafts on her left leg and from then on it will be healing and learning to adjust. She is all ready worn out with the current situation and is ready to be mobile again.

As for the foundation for Heather........It is done and ready to go! I have all ready made a donation to make sure that everything is functioning and it is. Over the past couple of days I have been telling Heather about all the people that have been calling our house and all the emails that I have personally been receiving and she cannot understand it. She can't believe that all these people are thinking about her and want to help. I personally think that she has no idea and I would love for everyone to show her how truly loved she is. So pass the foundation link to everyone that knows Heather that I do not and please encourage anyone to donate. The foundation site is http://www.hhfund.org/


Again thank you all so much for your support!

Ryan

P.S. One thing that I forgot to add is when visiting the foundation website please make sure you sign the guest book so that Heather can see all the names!!! Thanks again.

5 Days Until Our Cruise!

Most importantly, we are still getting updates from Ryan about Heather. She is doing great and probably only has one more surgery to go before she is released to rehab. Her boss and friends have started a non-profit organization for her and will start selling wrist bands. When there is information about that, I will certainly pass it along. We sent some flowers and balloons that should have been delivered yesterday and hopefully Heather had some room for them. If not, I hope someone was able to take them home and enjoy them!

As far as what we have been doing.... our family profile (writing, pictures, and Dear Birthmother letter) is almost complete and we hope to have that mailed off to the graphic design company before we leave for our cruise this weekend. Once they give that back for our approval, we will be activated with the agency and officially waiting. I think we will be ahead of our goal activation date of March 1st.

Karen surprised me with a huge bag of baby stuff, some new, some used. So sweet!! I could care less if it was used - it was used with love right?? Hats, socks, toys, etc. She gave me all her Dr. Brown's bottles and I just need to buy new nipples and vents for those. We were in Target on Saturday and they had tons of Carter's clothes on clearance so we stocked up in a bunch of different sizes. Our baby is going to be dressed up like a yellow duck for a few months!! Even if we were pregnant on our own, we probably wouldn't have found out the sex anyway, so the baby would have been dressed in yellow and green regardless.

We finally decided on our travel system - or stroller and matching "baby bucket". I am going to order that when we are back from vacation. Worst case, the baby can sleep in the stroller if we don't have a crib ready if we get a last minute call.

I'm having a hard time finding a crib that doesn't turn into a million things later down the road. I don't need one that converts to a full size bed - we already have one!! I think this just makes it more expensive? Do people really use it that way? I guess if you don't have furniture already that maybe it is good idea, but we have my antique bed that my parents gave to me when I just a wee one. Our social worker commented on it, that it was beautiful. We are going to leave it in the room with the crib so either our guests are going to be sharing a room with baby on visits or one of us will be sleeping in that bed if the nights get really bad!! We picked out a crib set from Target that matches what we already have in the room and it is adorable - well we think so anyway!

Everyone is asking if we are going to set up a registry and I guess that would be a good idea. It seems kind of funny but maybe it's odd to some people that I'm buying stuff already. If we get a call and we have to travel within 24 hours to our child, we will be prepared to do so and we will have the basics on hand to get us through. The car seat is a big one for us since we want something specific after doing all the research - it would be our luck that it would not be available on the way to the airport when we really needed it. If we really get in a pinch, friends would loan us their old car seat until we were able to work something out.

I'm looking forward to our cruise this weekend! Especially if we can get our profile out of the way, it will be a celebration to how far we have come so quickly. Everyone keeps asking me how we have done this as it seems that most adoptions take years. Well, the best answer I have is our agency is great! They are highly motivated to keep people coming into the system as quickly as they are leaving with children. Last year, they placed more babies than ever before and they are on track to pass that number this year as well. Our agency contacted the social worker in our area as soon as they received our application and sent us the list of everything we would need to get started. They really broke everything down into logical steps and we did one step at a time. We were lucky that we did not have to wait months to get a social worker to our house - she was ready to come before we were ready!!

We decided what we are doing at the ports for our cruise. First stop is Grand Cayman and we are going to have this as a shopping day (oh help me!) and play most of it by ear. Last year, we got maybe an hour in of wandering by the shops before we had to get back on the ship. The port is very close and there is no extra transportation required to get to the shopping, so this is a good choice for us. Bill can get a real Guiness there too!!

Second stop is Cozumel and we are snorkeling here. Watch out for me all in pink gear! We hope to get to some of the off-shore wrecks and the reef, of course!

Third port is Belize and we are going tubing in the caves. This will be a new one for us. The other choice was the zip lines in the rain forest and I just don't see myself doing that. My boss was just in Belize for a week and did the zip lines and a lady in the group ahead broke her arm when they didn't catch her coming in. Yikes!! And Bill has a "heights" issue, so I really don't see that as being a good choice anyway!

Last port is Costa Maya. This is another snorkel day and we are going sailing out on a catamaran. I can't wait - this is going to be fun! Speaking of catamarans, I need to find our sea bands.... can't forget those! They work like acupressure and last year, we wore them for about a day and then didn't need them at all. Maybe we never needed them, but I'll bring them just in case! Tif and I are doing the ship spa for the rest of the day to wrap up our busy week. We also said we were getting in the hot tub every night. Last year, I didn't go in once.... I'm making up for lost time. AND... I'll be enjoying the drink of the day!!

Another Heather Update

Heather is out of surgery from this morning. They did not find any evidence of major infections so that is great news!

Heather - we love you and are thinking of you!!

Heather Update!

Sent: Thursday, January 11, 2007 12:09 AM

Everyone,

First off Hebby is doing all right. We recieved a setback in that her injuries are not what we were initially told. Heather's injuries are slightly above the knees instead of below. This is dissappointing news but it does not deter our goal which is to get Hebby better and out of the hospital. Tomorrow morning around 8 she will go into another surgery. This is to clean out her wounds and make sure she is still all right. She will be going through several of these over the next week and each one tells us more and how she is progressing. As they do I will keep everyone posted.

Heather is still the same old Heather and is positive and strong and wonderful. Everyone's support has been overwhelming and I thank everyone from the bottom of my heart. I ask that everyone please continue with your thoughts and prayers for our Hebby so that she can get through this week and on the road to recovery. Thank you.

Love
Ryan

Home Study Complete!

Well.... in all honesty, the FBI clearances aren't back yet and those can take 8-10 weeks.

But.... we passed!! We had about 2 hours of questions about our financial plans, what we expect from the adoption process, our expections about a relationship with the birthparents, our parenting philosophies, a bunch of stuff. Then we gave a tour of our home and went over the "checklist" of items like posted emergency phone numbers, working bathrooms, where the baby is going to sleep, and how we store cleaning chemicals. The last part was individual interviews asking about how we were raised by our parents, our relationship today, my strengths and weaknesses. In all it lasted about 4 hours.

The social worker was making me a little nervous because she pointed out that we don't have any baby furniture and the car seat. Both of her last 2 home studies were completed and the families were placed with an infant within 2 weeks. She doesn't think we will be waiting very long once we get our profile submitted to the agency and are officially "active", although you never know! I guess I better start buying some stuff, but it feels so weird to buy things for someone that you don't know. I hope the baby will like greens and yellows because that's what we're buying!

Right as our social worker was walking out the door, Paula was calling both our cell phones to let us know that cousin Heather was in a very bad accident in Austin. We are praying for her and she is in our thoughts. Heather - we love you!!

So it was a day of good and bad.

Home Visit Today!!

The cleaning is done and the paperwork is all signed! The home visit is today right after lunch.

I must say, I'm not nervous. I have listened to everyone's advice that this is not a huge deal. It should be like talking to someone who wants to see what you're like and I think it is obvious that we are NOT crazy people. We have indoor plumbing to at least one bathroom and our child will not be trampled by livestock! I should make a copy of our check list for everyone to see... some of it is very comical.

Thank you to everyone who has been very encouraging with the "good luck" and the "you two will be the best parents to a lucky child" and such. It really helps to have such a support system!!

Congrats to Kristi who brought home her beautiful baby girl on Sunday!

Let The Cleaning Begin!

Christmas is over - at least it is at our house! The ornaments started coming off the tree last night and we rounded up all the decorations from around the house. We need to get all this stuff packed up and reclaim our space back. We are also interested in getting back to normal so our social worker will see our home how it really is on Tuesday for our home visit. She asked if she could bring another person along that is learning home studies and of course I said "Sure!". The more, the merrier!

I'm not sure what exactly I'm going to be serving. 1. To make sure our house smells yummy and 2. To be the hostess with the mostess! Probably bake up some gluten-free cookies and coffee and iced tea. There's no milk to be found in this house!

I've collected all our pictures for our profile and now we really need to get writing. It is so hard to write about yourselves and not be so critical of everything. I want to say the right thing that will connect with the right birthparents. I guess whatever we decide to say, it will be coming from us. It's just hard to get started! Writer's block??

Still stuck on my choices for a car seat, the Consumer Reports reviews on infant seats that came out yesterday are NOT helping. I was very surprised at the results and when I checked in with my ring of certified child seat technicians, they had some choice things to say about their reviews. Most of all, it was very disappointing to find out that all the installs were done by lab technicians and they did not have a child seat technician verify the seat was even installed properly. I don't see how a "scientific" experiment could be conducted when the seats are not being used properly. Second, most of the seats passed when they were installed with the seatbelts, which strengthens my theory that LATCH is not safer over seat belts.

There is a HUGE backlash from this review and it is popping up already. I saw a review written on the Target website for the Britax Companion and someone said don't buy this because it "Did not pass strict safety test". Puh-leeze. Do your research - this is one of the top rated infant car seats by certified child seat technicians. It concerns me that people (parents) blindly believe something someone tells them because "it was on TV so it must be true." Now people are going to be rushing out to buy a Graco Snugride because "it did so well". I will NEVER put my baby in one of those.

Actually, this might work great for me.... all the safer seats that I am considering, no one will probably want and I won't have to sit on a waiting list to get one! Once I actually decide which way I'm going anyway.... I'm glad I can wait until February to see the new Chicco KeyFit seats that fit up to 30 pounds. I know it has a matching stroller! I'm not exactly sold on a travel system either because a convertible seat works great too. I guess I need to figure out what fits in my truck the best. And I'm doing a belt install in the center position, I only have LATCH on the outboard seats. No question there. And no, you cannot use an anchor from each side seat to connect the child seat in the middle - it is NOT safe to do so!

I don't know why I'm ranting about this. I need to put this kind of passion in our family profile!!! LOL

What Do You Say To Someone....

... who is about to place their child for adoption? What would you put in a letter to them that would leave no doubt that we are the best parents for their child?

As our home study process is moving along over the next few weeks, our next big task is to write our "Dear Birthparent" letter and family profile. I am grateful that our agency has enlisted professional help to complete this phase. We could drive ourselves crazy with "do we look fun enough?" or "is this picture of me good enough?" and we would never get anything done! We know that our adoption questionnaire could be very open and inviting to several situations, but if our profile is not that interesting, we might not even be considered.

I have ordered the following reference that has come highly recommended. I hope that it will help us to put in paper what we feel in our hearts. "Reaching Out: The Guide to Writing a Terrific Dear Birthmother Letter" by Nelson Handel

I am trying to put myself in the other shoes and what would I think is a good parent if I got to choose anyone I wanted. What motivates one to choose adoption for their child? I'm glad they do! On the other hand, it is so important for us to be ourselves and the right child will be placed with us when it is meant to be. We want to connect with the right birthparents. It's hard to let go and let God work His plan. This is what I will have absolutely no control over and it's so important to remember that a birthparent will pick us for us. We are going to have to rely on faith and the ultimate plan.

Our paperwork for the home study is completed and now we are collecting the reference letters from our friends. We have every reason to believe that we will be recommended for adoption by our social worker unless we really do something crazy to mess that up. I am actually looking forward to meeting our social worker and talking about our dreams of a family. We have exchanged phone calls and emails since the beginning of December and she has graciously answered all my wacky questions. I can only imagine the craziness that will go into action this weekend as we take down all our holiday decorations and start cleaning like we are expecting the Queen of England. Home studies are NOT white glove tests, but everyone feels compelled to treat them that way. It is a special time and it will keep me busy!

Happy 2007!

Yay - a brand new year! I'm a whole year older.... hahaha big deal! I'm now an officially a "30 something"? Hopefully soon I'll be a 30 something parent.

We have scheduled our home visit with our social worker! She is coming to our home next Tuesday on the 9th at 1:30pm. I have to send her directions to our house and will have that done today. We have lots of Christmas decorations to take down and get put away but I will do a little bit each night. I know this weekend I will be going nuts with cleaning and making everything just so. I'm sure I'll be home that day and I'll have to make something yummy in the oven so our house smells nice and invititing! So between our home visit and our cruise that leaves on the 21st, it's going to be a busy January!

I am so glad that Bill is not running the marathon at Disney this year, it is this coming weekend. We have done too much driving around over the last few weeks that it would be the straw that breaks the camel's back. I have pager the next two weekends and then it is the weekend of our cruise leaving.

I have started throwing some items in my suitcase of things I need to remember for our cruise. I've also ordered a few fun things to take with me....

I ordered a new sarong to wear on the boat with a lotus pattern on it from http://www.pareoisland.com/

They are handmade in Hawaii and I hope it will show up on my doorstep soon!

Bill's parents gave us snorkel equipment to take on our cruise with us. Check this out..... it's pink from http://www.tusa.com/! It is so me!! I can't wait to use it! Bill's set is blue and black.... boring! :)