Quick Check-In

Things are going very well! We've been at the hospital for a majority of the day!

We got there at 8 am, H had us come get the baby so we could feed her and spend some time with her while H was getting showered and ready to go home. Baby had her newborn screen at 10:30 and we went back to spend a little time with H. We gave her a necklace and talked, cried, hugged. We went down the cafeteria to get a bite and I just cried and cried and cried. I could just not get a grasp on how I was supposed to be happy for us when we knew someone else's heart was breaking. I know that everyone that saw us assumed that we just found out someone died.... they would have been surprised to hear me say "We have a new baby!".

H said that she wanted an hour or so alone with her to say her good-byes. We said we wanted her to take as much time as she needed and we worked out that she would call me when she was ready to have us come back. She said it was important to her that she hand her to us when she leaves.

We went the capital for a while and took pictures of the changing leaves and the grounds around the building. It is a very beautiful area. We didn't want to go too far since we knew when H got up enough courage to want to leave, we did not want to prolong that.

H called a little after 1pm and said she was ready, as ready as she was going to be. We prepared ourselves for what was about to happen. H gave the baby lots of kisses and cuddles. We took many pictures together. She handed the baby to me and we spent a few minutes, creating a special bond, gazing at the miracle in front of us. H said that she feels so good about what she was doing and that we were going to be amazing parents. She is so excited for us!

And when she was ready, she left. H is so strong. I have no idea how she is keeping it together. We were alone with the baby and all we can do is stare at her. For the rest of today, we have fed her, changed her, sang to her, talked to her, everything. She is soooo beautiful! We fed her a late bottle, changed a full diaper (yikes!), and rocked her to sleep before wheeling her back to the nursery for the night. The nurse we have been working with was able to work out getting the baby to stay in the nursery an extra night...all the prayers are being answered! All the nurses stop us and tell us how they love the baby's hair and how good she is. She never cries... but I'm sure that will change!

We will back at the hospital tomorrow morning to meet with the pediatrician during rounds. The lawyer said we should be discharged around 2pm and then they are meeting H at 2:30 for her to sign the papers. So we still have a few steps to go.

All I can think about is the baby and H. I hope H is happy to be back home, back in her own bed. I hope that she is able to get some good rest tonight. She is surrounded by her family and friends that love her. We met so many of them in the last few days and they are wonderful. They have all looked through the photo album that we made for H with all our pictures. Everyone feels that they know us... I am thrilled that she is sharing so much. I hope that tomorrow is not too painful for her and that she is still able to follow through. I hope that it gets a bit better each day.

Please continue to keep H in your prayers. She is an amazing woman and I am better person for knowing her. There are some big steps still left... please keep good thoughts for us.