Bill called me from work and said that he would stop on the way home and buy candy for tonight. Sure... sounds like a good plan to me.
He comes home with $50 worth of candy. I am not kidding... I have the receipt as proof. $50. 4 ginormous bags of candy. We're talking somewhere around 800 pieces. We better have a lot of kids tonight and the rest is being marched over to the triplets next door!
Meanwhile.... it is calling to me from the front hall.... "I'm yummy in your tummy...Eat me!!"
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Happy Halloween!!!
I have to stop on the way home from work today to buy candy for the neighborhood kids. We didn't buy any yet because I didn't want it in the house (because I'd be eating it) and we didn't think we would still be home. LOL It appears that Little Roo does not want an October birthday.
More magazine reading tonight between answering the door!!
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Magazines, Night Two
Number of magazines read and recycled to date: 33
Number of magazines left to go: Almost a year of "Women's Health" and "Body & Soul"
Oldest magazine found so far: October 2006 - Allure
Good distraction technique? Yes and it's still working!
Verdict: I have too many magazines.
Number of magazines left to go: Almost a year of "Women's Health" and "Body & Soul"
Oldest magazine found so far: October 2006 - Allure
Good distraction technique? Yes and it's still working!
Verdict: I have too many magazines.
Mornings
I usually wake up in the mornings with Biscuit laying on me... not just by me, but ON me. I've gotten used to it over the last few years! Thank goodness she weighs less than 70 pounds! Bill laughs that she uses my behind for a pillow. It's better than her using my real pillow as a pillow. I just say that Biscuit is my personal space heater and we need each other.
It's hard to describe the feelings of the last week when I realize first thing in the morning that I've been woken up by my alarm clock and not by my cell phone with a middle-of-the-night call. It's really a let down. Maybe I'm getting myself too worked up when going to bed saying "Maybe this will be the night!". I don't know how NOT to do it. I don't know how to not think about all of it.
HOLY SHRIMP! I took a break after that last sentence to get a drink.... and my phone rang. It was H... NO labor yet! She wanted to call and apologize for not calling me back sooner, but she is just not a big talking-on-the-phone person. She is not feeling well, nesting like crazy, and doing what she can to get through the next days. I can certainly understand that. She was also afraid of disturbing me.... yeah, right!!!
H's doctor's appointment was yesterday and she is still at 2cm. No change from last week, with no change in sight as she says. Believe me, she is way more disappointed than we are! Her next appointment is on Monday.
I admitted that I was struggling with how much to call her and I want to give her the space that she needs. I'd rather show her that I am human and that I sometimes don't know what I am doing! She said she doesn't need space, this is just how she is! She also said that we do not know each other very well, so it's a little strange at times. I asked her what plans she and the boys had for Halloween tomorrow. I know that I can always "hear" a smile from her when I ask about them.
H said she thinks about Bill and I often and she is so very excited for us. I said we think of her a lot too, hence my problem with wanting to call her all the time! She said hopefully the next time she calls me, it will be from the hospital! Sounds good to me! I offered if she was more comfortable calling her social worker, L, that I won't be upset if she wants to call her first. H said no way, she wants to call me first for sure and I can tell L. Great! Things sound like they are going just as planned, I am so thankful. I am go grateful she called and renewed my spirit.
So tick tock.... time is going much slower for H than me I know. She is watching a ton of TV. I'm going to see if I can finish my magazine project!
It's hard to describe the feelings of the last week when I realize first thing in the morning that I've been woken up by my alarm clock and not by my cell phone with a middle-of-the-night call. It's really a let down. Maybe I'm getting myself too worked up when going to bed saying "Maybe this will be the night!". I don't know how NOT to do it. I don't know how to not think about all of it.
HOLY SHRIMP! I took a break after that last sentence to get a drink.... and my phone rang. It was H... NO labor yet! She wanted to call and apologize for not calling me back sooner, but she is just not a big talking-on-the-phone person. She is not feeling well, nesting like crazy, and doing what she can to get through the next days. I can certainly understand that. She was also afraid of disturbing me.... yeah, right!!!
H's doctor's appointment was yesterday and she is still at 2cm. No change from last week, with no change in sight as she says. Believe me, she is way more disappointed than we are! Her next appointment is on Monday.
I admitted that I was struggling with how much to call her and I want to give her the space that she needs. I'd rather show her that I am human and that I sometimes don't know what I am doing! She said she doesn't need space, this is just how she is! She also said that we do not know each other very well, so it's a little strange at times. I asked her what plans she and the boys had for Halloween tomorrow. I know that I can always "hear" a smile from her when I ask about them.
H said she thinks about Bill and I often and she is so very excited for us. I said we think of her a lot too, hence my problem with wanting to call her all the time! She said hopefully the next time she calls me, it will be from the hospital! Sounds good to me! I offered if she was more comfortable calling her social worker, L, that I won't be upset if she wants to call her first. H said no way, she wants to call me first for sure and I can tell L. Great! Things sound like they are going just as planned, I am so thankful. I am go grateful she called and renewed my spirit.
So tick tock.... time is going much slower for H than me I know. She is watching a ton of TV. I'm going to see if I can finish my magazine project!
Monday, October 29, 2007
Magazines, Night One
Number of magazines read and recycled to date: 15
Number of magazines left to go: Too many - not even half done!
Oldest magazine found so far: November 2006 - Glamour
Good distraction technique? Yes!
Verdict: I'll be doing this again tomorrow night for sure! I also gave my kitchen a good scrubbing after dinner and did a quick spin to the grocery store so Bill could have eggs to make a pan of gluten-free brownies... not bad for a night's work.
Number of magazines left to go: Too many - not even half done!
Oldest magazine found so far: November 2006 - Glamour
Good distraction technique? Yes!
Verdict: I'll be doing this again tomorrow night for sure! I also gave my kitchen a good scrubbing after dinner and did a quick spin to the grocery store so Bill could have eggs to make a pan of gluten-free brownies... not bad for a night's work.
Operation: Read Magazines!
I have a whole huge stack of magazines on my office floor. Some are from the spring! Ooooppps! I am going to read these and throw them into the recycle bin and get them out of my office for good!! I think I have 3 different titles and I only renewed one of them so this should get easier. I've just been piling them up and thinking I will get to them when I get to them. Well I never did, so I'm doing it now. What else am I going to do??
I just wanted to thank everyone for the very kind thoughts and words of encouragement that you all have been sending our way. Bill and I are very grateful to all of you and it warms our hearts that others are joining us in our journey. We are trying to be very strong and I pray that I can look back on all this in a few weeks and laugh at myself for being a huge brat.
On the adoption front, social worker L just left a voice message for H this afternoon. We'll see if H checks in before her appointment tomorrow or even afterwards. At this point, the social worker and I agree that H needs her space. Bill and I will offer support from afar... sometimes it comes in the form of just staying out of the way!
I just wanted to thank everyone for the very kind thoughts and words of encouragement that you all have been sending our way. Bill and I are very grateful to all of you and it warms our hearts that others are joining us in our journey. We are trying to be very strong and I pray that I can look back on all this in a few weeks and laugh at myself for being a huge brat.
On the adoption front, social worker L just left a voice message for H this afternoon. We'll see if H checks in before her appointment tomorrow or even afterwards. At this point, the social worker and I agree that H needs her space. Bill and I will offer support from afar... sometimes it comes in the form of just staying out of the way!
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Sunday Night
Yeppo.... still here in Florida!!
Watching game 4 of the World Series! Is this like groundhog day??
I helped Katherine put together her wedding album this morning. All of their pictures turned out sooooo nice! I wish Bill and I could have been married in a castle... she was really a princess that day!
I also called H's social worker this morning. I was seriously going to stress all day about if I should call H again today or not and I figured that it was worth my sanity to call L. This is really part of her job right? Mainly I wanted to tell her that even though H said she was going to call me on Friday, she didn't so L was not out of the loop in any way. I told her that H has actually never called me.... we've talked on the phone when she has answered it when I have called.
L does not see this as any indication of things going south. She believes that H is not wanting to get involved with us emotionally, it is just too difficult for her right now. She is trying to protect herself? L is going to call H in the morning to see how she is and get back with me. She is also going to chat with her about a specific hospital plan. I told L that the only thing H has told me is that she wants to spend only a few minutes saying good-bye to the baby and then she is going to let us be the parents from that moment on. L also told me that she does not think that H is planning on spending much time with us in the hospital. Again, a move that she might need to do to make it through this period. I am pretty disappointed, but I do know that if we are going to have any relationship, it will develop far off in the future anyway. I know that is not because she doesn't like us - it's not a personal thing. We will take our cues from her and we will give her the space she needs.
We will always think H is amazing and a much stronger person that either of us could ever be. Even if we don't communicate, she will always get the pictures and letters per the agreement we made with her. Little Roo will always know what a wonderful woman H is!
So Little Roo.... where are you????!!! Auntie Katherine bought you a fuzzy puppy Halloween costume so you need to appear BEFORE Thursday!
Watching game 4 of the World Series! Is this like groundhog day??
I helped Katherine put together her wedding album this morning. All of their pictures turned out sooooo nice! I wish Bill and I could have been married in a castle... she was really a princess that day!
I also called H's social worker this morning. I was seriously going to stress all day about if I should call H again today or not and I figured that it was worth my sanity to call L. This is really part of her job right? Mainly I wanted to tell her that even though H said she was going to call me on Friday, she didn't so L was not out of the loop in any way. I told her that H has actually never called me.... we've talked on the phone when she has answered it when I have called.
L does not see this as any indication of things going south. She believes that H is not wanting to get involved with us emotionally, it is just too difficult for her right now. She is trying to protect herself? L is going to call H in the morning to see how she is and get back with me. She is also going to chat with her about a specific hospital plan. I told L that the only thing H has told me is that she wants to spend only a few minutes saying good-bye to the baby and then she is going to let us be the parents from that moment on. L also told me that she does not think that H is planning on spending much time with us in the hospital. Again, a move that she might need to do to make it through this period. I am pretty disappointed, but I do know that if we are going to have any relationship, it will develop far off in the future anyway. I know that is not because she doesn't like us - it's not a personal thing. We will take our cues from her and we will give her the space she needs.
We will always think H is amazing and a much stronger person that either of us could ever be. Even if we don't communicate, she will always get the pictures and letters per the agreement we made with her. Little Roo will always know what a wonderful woman H is!
So Little Roo.... where are you????!!! Auntie Katherine bought you a fuzzy puppy Halloween costume so you need to appear BEFORE Thursday!
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Saturday Night
We're "enjoying" a night at home... we skipped the hockey game and a Halloween party invite and we're watching game 3 of the World Series. Dinner last night was great! I have to laugh about the Rockies being in the play-offs because when we were in Denver at the beginning of September, everyone had pretty much written them off. The games were having low turn-out and the sports casters were saying that the only way that the Rockies would even reach the play-offs would be if they won every game for the rest of the season and other key teams would have to have a few losses. So not many people would have dreamed this would be happening!
It's a nervous night. It just is. Probably the weekends are a little more stressful because there is less going on than if we were at work because that is always a great distraction. We ran some errands today and it has been a typical fall afternoon, watching college football. We've had no news from H or her social worker so we're trying to live life as usual. But it is anything but.
We've been here before so we can't help but be nervous about getting some bad news. I feel horrible that I second-guess everything that H has told me. Our bad experience in the past is not her fault in any way. It's not fair to think that she has not been anything but honest with us. I think it's very normal to feel the way we do and we expected this, but it still stinks. My heart skips a beat everytime my phone rings. Is this the call that says "Come now!" or will it be our worst nightmare again - "Baby is here... but please stay where you are."?
I can tell Bill is on edge. I'm on edge. This is definitely a test in patience and it is a test of faith as well. Nothing about this is in our control, except the way we feel. I know for me, most of the anxiety comes from not talking to H myself in quite a few days. My anxiety is feeding Bill's. I left her messages on Thursday and Friday. Then her social worker called me yesterday after work and gave me an update and said that H was planning to call me that night. She didn't. I am so thankful that I have gotten some news and at least she is still talking to her social worker or I would probably be a total wreck today. I know that she is still nervous to talk to me, she has never called me herself. She is not a talkative person to begin with. I can imagine that it is possible that she doesn't want to talk to me. It's not a personal thing, but having to interact with me is another reminder of the difficult task that she has ahead of her. She has prepared herself the best that she can but she still knows that it is going to hurt like nothing she has ever experienced before.
I keep reminding myself that we will have plenty of time with her when we are with her and it will take time to develop a relationship if it is meant to be. She doesn't know us and we don't know her. I just hope that I haven't run her off already! It's a very fine line to walk between calling her to let her know that we are thinking about her and coming off as someone that is trying to annoy her. Wow, this never gets easier! I feel bad for "whining", this is what we have asked for, this is what we have prayed for. I am grateful for this day and where we are right now, so very close to being parents. This is part of the process, whether anyone likes it or not!
I have plenty of projects to do around the house, but I'm terribly unmotivated. LOL! Jon is coming over tomorrow. He is going to do a long ride while Bill does a 16 mile run. I am going over to see Katherine in the morning and we are going to put her wedding albums together.
It's a nervous night. It just is. Probably the weekends are a little more stressful because there is less going on than if we were at work because that is always a great distraction. We ran some errands today and it has been a typical fall afternoon, watching college football. We've had no news from H or her social worker so we're trying to live life as usual. But it is anything but.
We've been here before so we can't help but be nervous about getting some bad news. I feel horrible that I second-guess everything that H has told me. Our bad experience in the past is not her fault in any way. It's not fair to think that she has not been anything but honest with us. I think it's very normal to feel the way we do and we expected this, but it still stinks. My heart skips a beat everytime my phone rings. Is this the call that says "Come now!" or will it be our worst nightmare again - "Baby is here... but please stay where you are."?
I can tell Bill is on edge. I'm on edge. This is definitely a test in patience and it is a test of faith as well. Nothing about this is in our control, except the way we feel. I know for me, most of the anxiety comes from not talking to H myself in quite a few days. My anxiety is feeding Bill's. I left her messages on Thursday and Friday. Then her social worker called me yesterday after work and gave me an update and said that H was planning to call me that night. She didn't. I am so thankful that I have gotten some news and at least she is still talking to her social worker or I would probably be a total wreck today. I know that she is still nervous to talk to me, she has never called me herself. She is not a talkative person to begin with. I can imagine that it is possible that she doesn't want to talk to me. It's not a personal thing, but having to interact with me is another reminder of the difficult task that she has ahead of her. She has prepared herself the best that she can but she still knows that it is going to hurt like nothing she has ever experienced before.
I keep reminding myself that we will have plenty of time with her when we are with her and it will take time to develop a relationship if it is meant to be. She doesn't know us and we don't know her. I just hope that I haven't run her off already! It's a very fine line to walk between calling her to let her know that we are thinking about her and coming off as someone that is trying to annoy her. Wow, this never gets easier! I feel bad for "whining", this is what we have asked for, this is what we have prayed for. I am grateful for this day and where we are right now, so very close to being parents. This is part of the process, whether anyone likes it or not!
I have plenty of projects to do around the house, but I'm terribly unmotivated. LOL! Jon is coming over tomorrow. He is going to do a long ride while Bill does a 16 mile run. I am going over to see Katherine in the morning and we are going to put her wedding albums together.
Friday, October 26, 2007
A Wee Bit of Magic Maybe??
H's social worker L called me while I was on the way home from work. She talked to H and wanted to let me know that she had checked in with her.
H said she is at 2cm and doesn't think that she will make it to her next OB appointment on Tuesday! Meaning she thinks she is close to going into labor! She has been getting the urge to be up and about, getting things moving. I'm glad that she is feeling better enough to be out doing things. I think she can use the distraction right now!
Here's hoping for a call soon!! Come on full moon!!!!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. _.•´¯`•.
H said she is at 2cm and doesn't think that she will make it to her next OB appointment on Tuesday! Meaning she thinks she is close to going into labor! She has been getting the urge to be up and about, getting things moving. I'm glad that she is feeling better enough to be out doing things. I think she can use the distraction right now!
Here's hoping for a call soon!! Come on full moon!!!!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. _.•´¯`•.
No Magic Yet!
No phone calls in the middle of the night. My work pager did go off at 1:37am this morning and Bill, who normally doesn't even hear it go off, was awake immediately asking "What's going on? What's happening?? Is it time to go?" I had to laugh!
It appears that my source of information for the full moon may not be exactly correct either. I haven't been able to confirm one way or the other, but maybe the full moon is tonight! I don't know exactly when the 24 hour time frame is. There is still time for magic!! Bill is still thinking we will be leaving this weekend, I say not. We're making plans with friends for dinner tonight, a hockey game tomorrow night, and Katherine wants me to help her put her wedding pictures together sometime in the next few days. So I have enough to do.
I didn't get a call back from H yesterday so maybe I will try giving her another call this afternoon. I certainly don't want to annoy her!
It appears that my source of information for the full moon may not be exactly correct either. I haven't been able to confirm one way or the other, but maybe the full moon is tonight! I don't know exactly when the 24 hour time frame is. There is still time for magic!! Bill is still thinking we will be leaving this weekend, I say not. We're making plans with friends for dinner tonight, a hockey game tomorrow night, and Katherine wants me to help her put her wedding pictures together sometime in the next few days. So I have enough to do.
I didn't get a call back from H yesterday so maybe I will try giving her another call this afternoon. I certainly don't want to annoy her!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Left Messages...
Both I and the social worker have left H a message on her cell phone this afternoon. I'm glad that she is out and about, I'm assuming she is anyway! She's up walking around, which is a very good thing.
Maybe we will get some of that full moon magic!! ** Hoping! **
On a much different and pee-your-pants note..... want to see some Human Tetris?? You can thank Katherine for digging up this comic relief!
Maybe we will get some of that full moon magic!! ** Hoping! **
On a much different and pee-your-pants note..... want to see some Human Tetris?? You can thank Katherine for digging up this comic relief!
Full Moon Tonight!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. _.•´¯`•.
OK, I know it's a long shot and not statistically proven in any way, but a girl can have hope!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. _.•´¯`•.
I have a few more items on my list to do today but last night I closed up the little pink suitcase that has all the baby stuff in it. I had to run to Target to get some new compression bags since our ones that we tend to use a lot have developed holes over the last year. I had to get one for H's pillow that I made her so it would squish down! I also put the blanket that my mom brought me and my brother home from the hospital with in one so it won't get dirty. I have a bunch of Bath & Body Works stuff for H and I taped all the lids so hopefully they won't leak at all (and they are all in a big freezer bag).
I've decided not to take a purse with me (VERY shocking!), but to put everything in our Overland Noho bag that Bill picked out for a diaper bag. Since I'm bringing all sorts of paperwork, my camera, and will not carry a purse on the way back home with the baby any way, why even take one to begin with just to end up putting it in the suitcase in a few days? So it's just a bigger tote... no big deal. Since I have to lug the car seat with me too, I'm thinking I'm pretty smart right now. LOL!
I found all my non-Florida clothes.... long sleeves, wool socks, and grabbed my coat from the front closet so my suitcase is getting full. Last night I was spraying my new Earth shoes with water repellant and then I did my Keen mary janes too after I finally decided which shoes I was taking with me (never more than 2 pairs!). The secret is out.... yes, I buy the same style of shoes no matter what the brand cause I'm cool like that. Then I sprayed a bunch of shoes for Bill looking for something to do! I always travel in my Keens since they are easy to get on and off at the airport and I can walk forever in them. The Earth shoes are definitely different for me since they have some negative heel thing going on but once I really walked around in them, they are very comfortable and I can always work on my posture! See I don't have much else to do right now but to distract myself with dumb details!
I will be calling H later today to see how she is doing.
OK, I know it's a long shot and not statistically proven in any way, but a girl can have hope!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. _.•´¯`•.
I have a few more items on my list to do today but last night I closed up the little pink suitcase that has all the baby stuff in it. I had to run to Target to get some new compression bags since our ones that we tend to use a lot have developed holes over the last year. I had to get one for H's pillow that I made her so it would squish down! I also put the blanket that my mom brought me and my brother home from the hospital with in one so it won't get dirty. I have a bunch of Bath & Body Works stuff for H and I taped all the lids so hopefully they won't leak at all (and they are all in a big freezer bag).
I've decided not to take a purse with me (VERY shocking!), but to put everything in our Overland Noho bag that Bill picked out for a diaper bag. Since I'm bringing all sorts of paperwork, my camera, and will not carry a purse on the way back home with the baby any way, why even take one to begin with just to end up putting it in the suitcase in a few days? So it's just a bigger tote... no big deal. Since I have to lug the car seat with me too, I'm thinking I'm pretty smart right now. LOL!
I found all my non-Florida clothes.... long sleeves, wool socks, and grabbed my coat from the front closet so my suitcase is getting full. Last night I was spraying my new Earth shoes with water repellant and then I did my Keen mary janes too after I finally decided which shoes I was taking with me (never more than 2 pairs!). The secret is out.... yes, I buy the same style of shoes no matter what the brand cause I'm cool like that. Then I sprayed a bunch of shoes for Bill looking for something to do! I always travel in my Keens since they are easy to get on and off at the airport and I can walk forever in them. The Earth shoes are definitely different for me since they have some negative heel thing going on but once I really walked around in them, they are very comfortable and I can always work on my posture! See I don't have much else to do right now but to distract myself with dumb details!
I will be calling H later today to see how she is doing.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
No Progress....
Bill predicted early last week that we would not be home this weekend. However, it looks like we will have at least a few more days of "us" time. Well, that is the assumption anyway! I have not heard from H, so she may still surprise me. I think if anything was news-worthy, she definitely would have called me by now. Baby girl is obviously happy where she is and doesn't feel like making an appearance any time soon.
My mom was just telling me last night that the day before I was born, she was at her normal doctor's appointment. The doctor told her confidently to schedule another appointment in a week because there was NO WAY she was going to have a baby in the next 7 days. Well I showed them and I was born less than 24 hours later! So no one really knows and it will just have to be good enough!
I've been going to bed with my phone on the nightstand every night. And I've taped a note to my garage door reminding me to make sure I have my phone when I walk out the door! That's the only thing I can do right now to be ready. That and pack a few more things or have them in a central location to grab quickly. Bill laughs at me. I don't think he has figured out how quickly I am going to shove him out the door when the call comes in. It's going to be fun!
My mom was just telling me last night that the day before I was born, she was at her normal doctor's appointment. The doctor told her confidently to schedule another appointment in a week because there was NO WAY she was going to have a baby in the next 7 days. Well I showed them and I was born less than 24 hours later! So no one really knows and it will just have to be good enough!
I've been going to bed with my phone on the nightstand every night. And I've taped a note to my garage door reminding me to make sure I have my phone when I walk out the door! That's the only thing I can do right now to be ready. That and pack a few more things or have them in a central location to grab quickly. Bill laughs at me. I don't think he has figured out how quickly I am going to shove him out the door when the call comes in. It's going to be fun!
Sherpani Sale!
Everyone is quite enamored with my poppy Cali bag and I am constantly being asked where I got it! Well if you're in the market for a new bag, Sherpani is having a sale!!
I don't work for them and I'm not paid to advertise.... I just think they make great products! Bill will probably hurt me if I buy another bag in the near future so I'm going to have to pass on this great sale.
H should be at her doctor's appointment now. She is going to call me if there is any progress to report. So I will post an update here if I get any news from her this afternoon!!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•.
I don't work for them and I'm not paid to advertise.... I just think they make great products! Bill will probably hurt me if I buy another bag in the near future so I'm going to have to pass on this great sale.
H should be at her doctor's appointment now. She is going to call me if there is any progress to report. So I will post an update here if I get any news from her this afternoon!!
.•´¯`•._.•´¯`•. LABOR VIBES! .•´¯`•._.•´¯`•.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Happy Monday!
I was pretty bummed coming into the office today because I was thinking about the email that I had to send H's social worker L. Plus today is my first day on a pager shift for work and I have it until Friday morning - YUCK! I was not the happiest camper rolling into the parking lot today.
I sent social worker L an email that I had yet to talk to H recently and that I had left H another message on Friday afternoon. I knew she was having problems with cell phone minutes and I'm sure it is resolving itself but I was pretty disappointed that I hadn't been able to talk to her myself in a week and a half. I was wanting to get in some more "getting to know you" conversations before everything goes down, but if we don't, we don't. We will have plenty of time for that later. I just want H to know that we are thinking about her.
My phone rang shortly after getting into the office and it was H's lawyer's office. I have been working with "N" in that office and she does a great job of keeping everyone informed on what is going on. She was calling this morning to tell me two big things that have happened recently. The first being that H was able to meet with them last week and she signed some of the preliminary papers that would allow the lawyer to file the TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) petition with the court. Obviously H cannot officially sign the "real" TPR until the baby actually arrives, but this allows her lawyer to get on the books with the courthouse. The hearing that the state requires to make the TPR permanent will be scheduled faster. This one surprised me! I had no idea they could do this but it is very good because things are moving in a great direction!
The second big item is that the birth father was served with papers last week that said he was going to be named as the father to H's baby and that there was an adoption plan in the works. It said that he could contest if he wanted. The law firm received a letter from him this morning that said that he didn't believe that he was the father (not a surprise), but that if the lawyer could attest that the adoptive family was "good", that he would sign away his parental rights and not hold the process up. The only thing that he asked was that he be called after the birth to let him know what the gender of the baby is. So this was also very welcome news to us as well! The next time I will talk to N will be after the baby is here! She said things are looking very very good from her standpoint. Every bit of encouraging news helps!
L sent me an email that she had talked to H and her cell phone issue was resolved yesterday. Then L proceeded to say that H was expecting my call this afternoon! She is afraid about bothering me at work so asked that I call her when I had a free minute. So I called H and we had a great conversation!
Her back is still very bad... and she is soooo bored that she is sleeping to pass the time. I'm glad she is able to get some rest! Her doctor has not even mentioned an induction because she might just take him up on it! She also cannot get an appointment with a chiro because they said she is too close to delivering and they are afraid of putting her in labor. Like that is a bad thing! LOL She gave me a few reviews of movies she has rented lately. H gives "Knocked Up" two thumbs up! I haven't seen it yet although I have heard great things about it. Her next doctor's appointment is tomorrow at 11am and she said she was going to call me if she is dialated any more. Last week she was at 1cm so we are HOPING for some good progress tomorrow! Otherwise I said I would call her later in the week to check in on her.
She sounds in very good spirits and said hopefully she will be calling within the next few days to tell me she is in labor. I told her how excited we are to come see her. The preliminary plan is to call me when she thinks she might be in labor. Then after she gets checked out at the hospital, she will call again to let us know for sure that they are either keeping her or sending her back home. So at least we can start getting ready to travel but wait for the final word to make sure. We're hoping for sooner rather than later! I think an October baby will be great but she will get here when she wants to get here.
So Little Roo... where are you??!!
I sent social worker L an email that I had yet to talk to H recently and that I had left H another message on Friday afternoon. I knew she was having problems with cell phone minutes and I'm sure it is resolving itself but I was pretty disappointed that I hadn't been able to talk to her myself in a week and a half. I was wanting to get in some more "getting to know you" conversations before everything goes down, but if we don't, we don't. We will have plenty of time for that later. I just want H to know that we are thinking about her.
My phone rang shortly after getting into the office and it was H's lawyer's office. I have been working with "N" in that office and she does a great job of keeping everyone informed on what is going on. She was calling this morning to tell me two big things that have happened recently. The first being that H was able to meet with them last week and she signed some of the preliminary papers that would allow the lawyer to file the TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) petition with the court. Obviously H cannot officially sign the "real" TPR until the baby actually arrives, but this allows her lawyer to get on the books with the courthouse. The hearing that the state requires to make the TPR permanent will be scheduled faster. This one surprised me! I had no idea they could do this but it is very good because things are moving in a great direction!
The second big item is that the birth father was served with papers last week that said he was going to be named as the father to H's baby and that there was an adoption plan in the works. It said that he could contest if he wanted. The law firm received a letter from him this morning that said that he didn't believe that he was the father (not a surprise), but that if the lawyer could attest that the adoptive family was "good", that he would sign away his parental rights and not hold the process up. The only thing that he asked was that he be called after the birth to let him know what the gender of the baby is. So this was also very welcome news to us as well! The next time I will talk to N will be after the baby is here! She said things are looking very very good from her standpoint. Every bit of encouraging news helps!
L sent me an email that she had talked to H and her cell phone issue was resolved yesterday. Then L proceeded to say that H was expecting my call this afternoon! She is afraid about bothering me at work so asked that I call her when I had a free minute. So I called H and we had a great conversation!
Her back is still very bad... and she is soooo bored that she is sleeping to pass the time. I'm glad she is able to get some rest! Her doctor has not even mentioned an induction because she might just take him up on it! She also cannot get an appointment with a chiro because they said she is too close to delivering and they are afraid of putting her in labor. Like that is a bad thing! LOL She gave me a few reviews of movies she has rented lately. H gives "Knocked Up" two thumbs up! I haven't seen it yet although I have heard great things about it. Her next doctor's appointment is tomorrow at 11am and she said she was going to call me if she is dialated any more. Last week she was at 1cm so we are HOPING for some good progress tomorrow! Otherwise I said I would call her later in the week to check in on her.
She sounds in very good spirits and said hopefully she will be calling within the next few days to tell me she is in labor. I told her how excited we are to come see her. The preliminary plan is to call me when she thinks she might be in labor. Then after she gets checked out at the hospital, she will call again to let us know for sure that they are either keeping her or sending her back home. So at least we can start getting ready to travel but wait for the final word to make sure. We're hoping for sooner rather than later! I think an October baby will be great but she will get here when she wants to get here.
So Little Roo... where are you??!!
Thursday, October 18, 2007
38 Week Update!
Update from the social worker - H's back is REALLY bothering her. She has had no relief in the last week. She is trying to see a chiro fast to help and I hope that works out soon. I am so concerned about her and I feel terrible that she is in so much pain.
I called and left her a message last night but I didn't hear back from her. I also told her that we were going out to watch a friend's hockey game but I was just calling to see how she was doing. I told her social worker that if I didn't hear from her, I was going to leave another message this afternoon. Her social worker said she was also going to call her also.
The message I just got from the social worker told me about her continuing back situation and that H wants to talk to me, but that she has run out of minutes on her cell phone. She is getting more minutes tomorrow and asked me to call her in the afternoon. BUT the bigger news is that she did go to the doctor and she is dialated to 1cm. I know that she could stay there for days or weeks, but it's some progress, right?!
The portable bassinet showed up. It is huge!!!! I am very surprised for sure. It folds down nicely and I think it will fit in my suitcase but it could fit my 70 pound dog, Biscuit!! I think we will get a lot of use out of it!
Other than that, I have picked through my prized carriers and I think I have selected the ones I will be taking. Thanks to Kristi for reminding me how much I'm going to love my stretchy wraps with the baby and that's the first one to make sure I have room for! If I really don't have room for the others then my Bali Baby Stretch will last me the entire trip for what I need. I can't wait! She's going to be wrapped up like a baby kangaroo! I'm trying to pack as light as I can, so I might take my BBS and one pouch sling. I'm leaning towards my Bounding Blossoms Hotsling! Oh snap... Hotslings is having a sale????
I called and left her a message last night but I didn't hear back from her. I also told her that we were going out to watch a friend's hockey game but I was just calling to see how she was doing. I told her social worker that if I didn't hear from her, I was going to leave another message this afternoon. Her social worker said she was also going to call her also.
The message I just got from the social worker told me about her continuing back situation and that H wants to talk to me, but that she has run out of minutes on her cell phone. She is getting more minutes tomorrow and asked me to call her in the afternoon. BUT the bigger news is that she did go to the doctor and she is dialated to 1cm. I know that she could stay there for days or weeks, but it's some progress, right?!
The portable bassinet showed up. It is huge!!!! I am very surprised for sure. It folds down nicely and I think it will fit in my suitcase but it could fit my 70 pound dog, Biscuit!! I think we will get a lot of use out of it!
Other than that, I have picked through my prized carriers and I think I have selected the ones I will be taking. Thanks to Kristi for reminding me how much I'm going to love my stretchy wraps with the baby and that's the first one to make sure I have room for! If I really don't have room for the others then my Bali Baby Stretch will last me the entire trip for what I need. I can't wait! She's going to be wrapped up like a baby kangaroo! I'm trying to pack as light as I can, so I might take my BBS and one pouch sling. I'm leaning towards my Bounding Blossoms Hotsling! Oh snap... Hotslings is having a sale????
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Packing Up!
I have been packing like a fool the last few days. I just have a feeling that I need to get it done. Whether or not my feeling means anything at all remains to be seen! I'm probably going to call H tonight or tomorrow and see how she is doing. About 2 weeks to go! Really the baby will be here within the next 3 weeks for sure. There is no way they will let her go too far past her due date since she is measuring at a good weight already.
So I've packed up all the goodies and gifts we are taking for H. I've been doing laundry and all the tiny clothes are packed up and ready to go. My parents popped in last weekend and brought a few sleepers with footies since we are traveling north and the weather will be much cooler than here. I have undershirts, socks, babylegs, hats, bibs, rompers, all the essentials. I also have a list going of everything we are going to buy there to get us settled in and I'm collecting coupons LOL! I have a red gatecheck bag for the car seat and someone gave me a great idea to pack blankets in the carseat to get it out of the luggage. Did that!!
I've also been gathering stuff for me.... and I packed up my toiletry bag. I'm keeping up on my laundry so I can pack and go when the great call arrives.
Now I have the age old question to answer that every baby-wearing mama asks herself..... WHICH baby carriers do I bring? How will I ever choose??! I will probably bring one of each: MT, Hotsling, stretchy wrap. I just don't know which patterns I want!! Such problems!
So I've packed up all the goodies and gifts we are taking for H. I've been doing laundry and all the tiny clothes are packed up and ready to go. My parents popped in last weekend and brought a few sleepers with footies since we are traveling north and the weather will be much cooler than here. I have undershirts, socks, babylegs, hats, bibs, rompers, all the essentials. I also have a list going of everything we are going to buy there to get us settled in and I'm collecting coupons LOL! I have a red gatecheck bag for the car seat and someone gave me a great idea to pack blankets in the carseat to get it out of the luggage. Did that!!
I've also been gathering stuff for me.... and I packed up my toiletry bag. I'm keeping up on my laundry so I can pack and go when the great call arrives.
Now I have the age old question to answer that every baby-wearing mama asks herself..... WHICH baby carriers do I bring? How will I ever choose??! I will probably bring one of each: MT, Hotsling, stretchy wrap. I just don't know which patterns I want!! Such problems!
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Injury Report!
I wrote H's social worker "L" a note yesterday about the gifts that I have been gathering and to make sure that we were not going to violate any of the state laws about the price tag attached. Florida is very lenient about the whole gift thing and in short of giving someone a new car or an expensive diamond ring, it would be allowed. In short, everything we have sounded perfect to L and no troubles there.
Then L tells me that H hurt her back recently and has been doing time on the couch. I had been thinking about giving H a call in the next few days to check in but then when I heard she was not feeling well, I decided that I was calling her that night! Besides, L told H that "Jenn is going to call you soon... probably tonight!" So I did.
She sounded great and I told her I was concerned about how she was feeling. She said she's physically feeling pretty crappy. Not only has she hurt her back just doing normal everyday activities, but she is having some serious sciatica pain and the wiggly baby isn't helping. This happened with her previous pregnancy as well and she knows that it will go away as soon as she has the baby. She only has a few weeks to go! So she's spending time on the couch with a ton of pillows and her mom has been coming over to make her dinner and keep her company. They have been watching a lot of movies lately - my kind of girl!!
She did tell me that she had a doctor's appointment and the baby is head down and ready to go. OH! Apparently the doctor mentioned that he thought within the next 2 weeks, she could go into labor but H is afraid to get her hopes up because she knows then she is sure to go past her due date. We're obviously hoping for sooner rather than later!! Not that I don't still have plenty to do and am sitting around twiddling my thumbs...
We had a very nice chat. She admitted that she is still a little nervous talking to me on the phone, but that is very natural. Until we really meet each other in person, it probably will be that way. We talked about how this is very strange situation for someone looking from the outside in. If you haven't been through it, it's hard to understand and something that most people will never have to deal with! It's very much like dating - trying to figure out when to call, what to say, what not to say. H laughed when I told her that and she definitely agreed. I'm trying to be as human as possible... we're in the same boat and I'm not Super Woman, you know?
As time goes by, I think we will be great friends. H is happy that we want to have a relationship with her. That made her feel really good. We would never ever forget about her and skip off into the sunset. It seems that we have a lot of similar interests, did I ever mention that she played the violin in school? It is very easy to talk to her. I wanted her to talk more about her boys because I could tell in the first call that she just lit up thinking about them so I think that helped her be more at ease. She said she is going to pack up some pictures in her hospital bag to share with me. She wants to give me updated pictures through the years to keep in a special book for the baby. I am thrilled!
H told me at least 6 times that she is not going to change her mind about the adoption and that she is *really* excited for us to become parents. She said she did not want us to worry about her changing her decision. I think it is very sweet of her to want to tell us that but we'll still be cautious until it's all said and done. She has been thinking a lot about what is going to happen in the hospital and she is preparing herself the best she can. She is in counseling weekly and it is really helping her. I think she said a few things she wanted to say to me. I really wanted to keep everything light and up beat but I had to tell her that we will never be able to tell her how grateful we are to her for making our dreams come true. She said we didn't have to tell her, she already knows!! This is a case where actions really will speak louder than words.
We talked for 20 minutes or so. I didn't want to keep her too long since I knew it was close to dinner there and I am not one to stand between a pregnant woman and food! Her mom was there making her dinner and is taking really good care of her. H said she is very lucky. I think we are the lucky ones!
Then L tells me that H hurt her back recently and has been doing time on the couch. I had been thinking about giving H a call in the next few days to check in but then when I heard she was not feeling well, I decided that I was calling her that night! Besides, L told H that "Jenn is going to call you soon... probably tonight!" So I did.
She sounded great and I told her I was concerned about how she was feeling. She said she's physically feeling pretty crappy. Not only has she hurt her back just doing normal everyday activities, but she is having some serious sciatica pain and the wiggly baby isn't helping. This happened with her previous pregnancy as well and she knows that it will go away as soon as she has the baby. She only has a few weeks to go! So she's spending time on the couch with a ton of pillows and her mom has been coming over to make her dinner and keep her company. They have been watching a lot of movies lately - my kind of girl!!
She did tell me that she had a doctor's appointment and the baby is head down and ready to go. OH! Apparently the doctor mentioned that he thought within the next 2 weeks, she could go into labor but H is afraid to get her hopes up because she knows then she is sure to go past her due date. We're obviously hoping for sooner rather than later!! Not that I don't still have plenty to do and am sitting around twiddling my thumbs...
We had a very nice chat. She admitted that she is still a little nervous talking to me on the phone, but that is very natural. Until we really meet each other in person, it probably will be that way. We talked about how this is very strange situation for someone looking from the outside in. If you haven't been through it, it's hard to understand and something that most people will never have to deal with! It's very much like dating - trying to figure out when to call, what to say, what not to say. H laughed when I told her that and she definitely agreed. I'm trying to be as human as possible... we're in the same boat and I'm not Super Woman, you know?
As time goes by, I think we will be great friends. H is happy that we want to have a relationship with her. That made her feel really good. We would never ever forget about her and skip off into the sunset. It seems that we have a lot of similar interests, did I ever mention that she played the violin in school? It is very easy to talk to her. I wanted her to talk more about her boys because I could tell in the first call that she just lit up thinking about them so I think that helped her be more at ease. She said she is going to pack up some pictures in her hospital bag to share with me. She wants to give me updated pictures through the years to keep in a special book for the baby. I am thrilled!
H told me at least 6 times that she is not going to change her mind about the adoption and that she is *really* excited for us to become parents. She said she did not want us to worry about her changing her decision. I think it is very sweet of her to want to tell us that but we'll still be cautious until it's all said and done. She has been thinking a lot about what is going to happen in the hospital and she is preparing herself the best she can. She is in counseling weekly and it is really helping her. I think she said a few things she wanted to say to me. I really wanted to keep everything light and up beat but I had to tell her that we will never be able to tell her how grateful we are to her for making our dreams come true. She said we didn't have to tell her, she already knows!! This is a case where actions really will speak louder than words.
We talked for 20 minutes or so. I didn't want to keep her too long since I knew it was close to dinner there and I am not one to stand between a pregnant woman and food! Her mom was there making her dinner and is taking really good care of her. H said she is very lucky. I think we are the lucky ones!
Monday, October 8, 2007
Purchases!
It still feels strange to make baby item purchases. I am a little superstitious about the whole placement thing sometimes. But sitting back and not doing anything doesn't work either.
So, because we had a coupon from Target to get 10% off anything and because we had a $100 gift card that we got for buying my Dyson in the spring, we bought the big daddy car seat. This is NOT the seat that we will be taking with us. It's huge!! Britax Decathlon Convertible Car Seat - in Sahara (Taupe/Gray). I REALLY like the cowmooflage Marathon for my truck... Bill not so much. I mean how much more fun can a car seat get?? This tan and gray one is going in his car... snore! But he has an image to uphold and all his friends told him to not get a girly seat. This battle is far from over!
I did also pick up a travel bassinet to take with us. My only other thought was to buy a pack-n-play when we got there and then mail it back to myself when we were leaving to come back home. Holy smokes - those things weigh 30 pounds!! Good grief! So I found this hopefully handy little thing that folds up flat in the suitcase:
A Pogy Travel Bassinet (also on target.com). It folds like those sunshades that pop out for your windshield. Yep, this is going to be loads of fun! I always hit myself in the head with those. It has a little mattress on the bottom and mosquito netting that lays over the top. In that respect, it will be handy to use outdoors maybe? I just want somewhere for the baby to sleep without sleeping in her carseat, a stroller, or who knows where else. Great for little trips, naps and whatnot on the go. I found some other travel beds but the small height on the side really bothered me but this one is 18" deep. Sure, a really wiggly kid might tip it over and crawl right out when bigger, but I intend to use this on the floor and maybe barricaded with pillows. I have high hopes for this thing!! I really wish we could take our Amby bed with us, but that's not going to happen either.
I did pick up a few baby things over the weekend from the real Target store.... some white long-sleeved shirts, a few pairs of little pull-on pants, couple hats, tiny socks. It's all good fun! Then I thought the washer or dryer ate 2 of the tiny socks and I was soooo mad. Turns out they were hiding in some other clothes. I need to remember to put all those little things in a washable bag or I'm going to lose them for sure!!!
Hopefully I am able to chat some with H this week. I don't want to drive her away screaming. I'm sure this is a very difficult situation for her. I pray for H all the time. It's the only thing I can do besides be at her side, advocate for her, cheer her on, lend an ear when she needs one.
Amanda called today to see what's going on. She asked me what I was going to be for Halloween. I said "Hopefully a mom!!!!".
So, because we had a coupon from Target to get 10% off anything and because we had a $100 gift card that we got for buying my Dyson in the spring, we bought the big daddy car seat. This is NOT the seat that we will be taking with us. It's huge!! Britax Decathlon Convertible Car Seat - in Sahara (Taupe/Gray). I REALLY like the cowmooflage Marathon for my truck... Bill not so much. I mean how much more fun can a car seat get?? This tan and gray one is going in his car... snore! But he has an image to uphold and all his friends told him to not get a girly seat. This battle is far from over!
I did also pick up a travel bassinet to take with us. My only other thought was to buy a pack-n-play when we got there and then mail it back to myself when we were leaving to come back home. Holy smokes - those things weigh 30 pounds!! Good grief! So I found this hopefully handy little thing that folds up flat in the suitcase:
A Pogy Travel Bassinet (also on target.com). It folds like those sunshades that pop out for your windshield. Yep, this is going to be loads of fun! I always hit myself in the head with those. It has a little mattress on the bottom and mosquito netting that lays over the top. In that respect, it will be handy to use outdoors maybe? I just want somewhere for the baby to sleep without sleeping in her carseat, a stroller, or who knows where else. Great for little trips, naps and whatnot on the go. I found some other travel beds but the small height on the side really bothered me but this one is 18" deep. Sure, a really wiggly kid might tip it over and crawl right out when bigger, but I intend to use this on the floor and maybe barricaded with pillows. I have high hopes for this thing!! I really wish we could take our Amby bed with us, but that's not going to happen either.
I did pick up a few baby things over the weekend from the real Target store.... some white long-sleeved shirts, a few pairs of little pull-on pants, couple hats, tiny socks. It's all good fun! Then I thought the washer or dryer ate 2 of the tiny socks and I was soooo mad. Turns out they were hiding in some other clothes. I need to remember to put all those little things in a washable bag or I'm going to lose them for sure!!!
Hopefully I am able to chat some with H this week. I don't want to drive her away screaming. I'm sure this is a very difficult situation for her. I pray for H all the time. It's the only thing I can do besides be at her side, advocate for her, cheer her on, lend an ear when she needs one.
Amanda called today to see what's going on. She asked me what I was going to be for Halloween. I said "Hopefully a mom!!!!".
Friday, October 5, 2007
Bill Says....
Don't sweat the small stuff because it's ALL small stuff!
Yeah well, I'm trying very hard to subscribe to that theory. I know the month ahead will be hard on me, on Bill, on H, our family, her family, everybody. It just will. And no one can predict what the outcome will be until it's actually happened.
I called H yesterday. I completely expected her not to answer her phone, although I hoped she would! She didn't so I got to talk to the voicemail. I said it was nice to have talked to her on Wednesday, Bill and I are looking forward to meeting her in person and giving her a big hug. Then I proceeded to say that she didn't need to call me back, I just wanted to say a quick "hi" and if I don't talk to her until next week, that I hope she has a wonderful weekend.
So with that, I hung up. And then I started questioning whether or not I addressed her by H (which I'm sure I did) or if I called her Nicole because I was in the middle of sending one of my girlfriends an email. It is driving me nuts. The next time I do talk to her, I will have to ask and I can make light of myself because I'm human. Guess my crazy Jenn time has started. I can put on a great face but inside everything is going nuts. H hasn't called me back.... I shouldn't be disappointed because I didn't ask her to. I will probably call again later next week and hopefully we can chat a bit. It's small stuff, right?
I'm feeling a bit guilty sharing the news of the latest match with our family. I know they are very happy for us and they would want to know what is going on in our lives, but I recognize that this journey is a rollercoaster for them too. How much is too much? How much good and bad news do we spring on them and make them deal with? The hardest thing I ever had to do was tell my mom on that sad Thursday morning that D and G kept the baby and we had nothing. She was so upset, probably because she knew how much I was hurting. I remember telling Bill that he needed to call his mom and I was sorry but he was going to have to tell her. I just could not do it again that day.
I know that some people choose not to tell their families until they are 100% they have the baby, which means they are probably already at home by then. Could you imagine getting that phone call?? That would be a hard thing to keep to myself, I'll tell you that. I think our families would not be happy if we kept that kind of thing from them. Our parents and siblings have been absolutely amazing - we are so very lucky. They have supported us 100% through thick and thin, good and bad. I just know we are in some ways dragging them along behind us.
It's interesting how your perceptions change as you get closer and closer to being a parent yourself. It's not an easy job!!
Not much on the "to do" list this weekend.... I have one baby carrier to finish, and another to start and finish. A box of "new to me" baby clothes arrived that I want to wash. Probably not a bad idea to start throwing things in the little suitcase and make a list of what we will need to buy when we get to where we are going.
I know we are going to get one of those in the middle of the night phone calls! H told me that her first son was 2 days late, 12 hours of labor, next son was 1 day early, 5 hours of labor. Hmmmm... when are things going to go crazy??? I really doubt we will make it there for the birth, there are no plans to induce unless she seriously goes beyond her due date. We're just along for the ride!
Yeah well, I'm trying very hard to subscribe to that theory. I know the month ahead will be hard on me, on Bill, on H, our family, her family, everybody. It just will. And no one can predict what the outcome will be until it's actually happened.
I called H yesterday. I completely expected her not to answer her phone, although I hoped she would! She didn't so I got to talk to the voicemail. I said it was nice to have talked to her on Wednesday, Bill and I are looking forward to meeting her in person and giving her a big hug. Then I proceeded to say that she didn't need to call me back, I just wanted to say a quick "hi" and if I don't talk to her until next week, that I hope she has a wonderful weekend.
So with that, I hung up. And then I started questioning whether or not I addressed her by H (which I'm sure I did) or if I called her Nicole because I was in the middle of sending one of my girlfriends an email. It is driving me nuts. The next time I do talk to her, I will have to ask and I can make light of myself because I'm human. Guess my crazy Jenn time has started. I can put on a great face but inside everything is going nuts. H hasn't called me back.... I shouldn't be disappointed because I didn't ask her to. I will probably call again later next week and hopefully we can chat a bit. It's small stuff, right?
I'm feeling a bit guilty sharing the news of the latest match with our family. I know they are very happy for us and they would want to know what is going on in our lives, but I recognize that this journey is a rollercoaster for them too. How much is too much? How much good and bad news do we spring on them and make them deal with? The hardest thing I ever had to do was tell my mom on that sad Thursday morning that D and G kept the baby and we had nothing. She was so upset, probably because she knew how much I was hurting. I remember telling Bill that he needed to call his mom and I was sorry but he was going to have to tell her. I just could not do it again that day.
I know that some people choose not to tell their families until they are 100% they have the baby, which means they are probably already at home by then. Could you imagine getting that phone call?? That would be a hard thing to keep to myself, I'll tell you that. I think our families would not be happy if we kept that kind of thing from them. Our parents and siblings have been absolutely amazing - we are so very lucky. They have supported us 100% through thick and thin, good and bad. I just know we are in some ways dragging them along behind us.
It's interesting how your perceptions change as you get closer and closer to being a parent yourself. It's not an easy job!!
Not much on the "to do" list this weekend.... I have one baby carrier to finish, and another to start and finish. A box of "new to me" baby clothes arrived that I want to wash. Probably not a bad idea to start throwing things in the little suitcase and make a list of what we will need to buy when we get to where we are going.
I know we are going to get one of those in the middle of the night phone calls! H told me that her first son was 2 days late, 12 hours of labor, next son was 1 day early, 5 hours of labor. Hmmmm... when are things going to go crazy??? I really doubt we will make it there for the birth, there are no plans to induce unless she seriously goes beyond her due date. We're just along for the ride!
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
A Great Call!
My call with H this afternoon went extremely well. She sounds like someone I know already! I can't wait to meet her in person and give her a big hug.She affirmed that she was making the right decision for the baby. She knows it is going to be hard and difficult emotionally on her. She knows how it feels to be a mom already but she wants to do this because it's the right thing to do. She said that she knows we can give the baby all the things that she cannot. A third child is just out of her capability.
We talked about adoption being an opportunity to create an extended family. She is very happy that we will be as open with communication as she would like. H knows that she will always be curious about the child and I want to share as much information as she is comfortable with without making her feel bad.
At this point, she said she wanted to spend only a few minutes after delivery saying good-bye to the baby. She said she only wants her mom in the delivery room... and we are perfectly fine with that! It's a very private thing and she doesn't know us at all. H wants us to start bonding with the baby immediately. She wants us to have the new parent experience as much as possible. H asked me if we had picked out a name and I said that we did.
H is very sweet and so open. She said she could feel from our profile what kind of people we are. Her social worker just wrote me a little while ago and said H said I was very nice and made her nervousness go away quickly. We exchanged cell numbers.
The first call is usually a little strange and no one really knows what to say. I will probably call at the end of the week just to wish her a very happy weekend and make that first reach out to her. Hopefully this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship!
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Meeting Tomorrow!
The social worker has set up a conference call with H and myself for tomorrow afternoon. I'll be at work and I reserved a conference room so I won't be sitting at my desk annoying everyone sitting around me. I'm getting nervous! I want to make a good impression!
Katherine's Wedding Day!!
Katherine and Jonathan are getting married today!! (Note - this is not my brother!) They are in England at Langley Castle with all their family. I am so excited for them! We really wanted to go but then we decided to take our trip to Colorado in September. Up until she left last week, I was hoping impulse would take over and I'd fly over there too. Hahahaha!! Anyone that knows me is sure that I would NEVER just do that! I'm glad we stayed here, otherwise we would have missed The Call. Katherine doesn't know....hopefully I can tell her when she gets back before we head out. Congratulations!!!!
I wanted to say Hi to Kristi's Mom!! I got your message... thank you!!!So they papers came in yesterday and they went out today. They are all notarized and Mr. FedEx is carrying them now. Yesterday was absolutely crazy. Besides trying to do my real job and being on a stupid crisis call for 5 hours, I got 3 calls from our lawyer, 2 calls from H's social worker, 1 call from the agency's accountant, numerous calls from Bill ("what are you doing?"), and clingy pets that kept wanting to sit on my lap. I had time to make an emergency run to the post office to priority mail our $66.50 to the agency - thankfully I did not have to overnight that or wire it! Geez!! As soon as Bill got home last night, we ran to the notary to get our papers stamped and we forgot to stop on the way home and buy more dog food. Poor Biscuit - we have to get to the store today!
Hopefully H will get in touch with her social worker today so we can get a conference call together. I am so excited to talk to her!!
Monday, October 1, 2007
Papers Came!
I have them. I feel so much better!
It also included a ton of medical records which we did not get last time. Level II U/S reports, everything, looks great! Wow this is really happening again!
It also included a ton of medical records which we did not get last time. Level II U/S reports, everything, looks great! Wow this is really happening again!
Mr. FedEx - Where Are You???
I hate the waiting! I want these darn papers so badly! I know exactly what they say, but until we have them notarized and returned, it feels like more limbo!
I was praying they would come on Saturday... they did not. I told H's social worker "L" that I would call her on Monday to either ask her more questions or to let her know the papers were signed and in the mail. I have to call her this morning and say they are still missing or they just arrived and they will go out tomorrow. Ugh!!
BUT as I was typing this.... our lawyer here just called wanting to discuss our match since we are getting close to the birth so I'm pretty sure they have the right family now. :) There is no way she would have called us again. She gave us lots of advice with our last match as she was drawing all the papers for that round too. She has been talking a lot with the other lawyer so things are moving fast. She is sending us more papers too!
Come on Mr. FedEx..... please knock on my door!!
I was praying they would come on Saturday... they did not. I told H's social worker "L" that I would call her on Monday to either ask her more questions or to let her know the papers were signed and in the mail. I have to call her this morning and say they are still missing or they just arrived and they will go out tomorrow. Ugh!!
BUT as I was typing this.... our lawyer here just called wanting to discuss our match since we are getting close to the birth so I'm pretty sure they have the right family now. :) There is no way she would have called us again. She gave us lots of advice with our last match as she was drawing all the papers for that round too. She has been talking a lot with the other lawyer so things are moving fast. She is sending us more papers too!
Come on Mr. FedEx..... please knock on my door!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
