Sunday, October 28, 2007

Sunday Night

Yeppo.... still here in Florida!!

Watching game 4 of the World Series! Is this like groundhog day??

I helped Katherine put together her wedding album this morning. All of their pictures turned out sooooo nice! I wish Bill and I could have been married in a castle... she was really a princess that day!

I also called H's social worker this morning. I was seriously going to stress all day about if I should call H again today or not and I figured that it was worth my sanity to call L. This is really part of her job right? Mainly I wanted to tell her that even though H said she was going to call me on Friday, she didn't so L was not out of the loop in any way. I told her that H has actually never called me.... we've talked on the phone when she has answered it when I have called.

L does not see this as any indication of things going south. She believes that H is not wanting to get involved with us emotionally, it is just too difficult for her right now. She is trying to protect herself? L is going to call H in the morning to see how she is and get back with me. She is also going to chat with her about a specific hospital plan. I told L that the only thing H has told me is that she wants to spend only a few minutes saying good-bye to the baby and then she is going to let us be the parents from that moment on. L also told me that she does not think that H is planning on spending much time with us in the hospital. Again, a move that she might need to do to make it through this period. I am pretty disappointed, but I do know that if we are going to have any relationship, it will develop far off in the future anyway. I know that is not because she doesn't like us - it's not a personal thing. We will take our cues from her and we will give her the space she needs.

We will always think H is amazing and a much stronger person that either of us could ever be. Even if we don't communicate, she will always get the pictures and letters per the agreement we made with her. Little Roo will always know what a wonderful woman H is!

So Little Roo.... where are you????!!! Auntie Katherine bought you a fuzzy puppy Halloween costume so you need to appear BEFORE Thursday!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you!! Many prayers and good labor vibes H's way!!

Anonymous said...

Katherine is too much! : ) Hang in there and keep blogging away with all your thoughts. Writing is a fabulous release and a beautiful gift for those that love you. Come on Little Roo!

Anonymous said...

biJenn -

Olivia's birth mom, L, chose not to meet us or ever talk to us. And, she never saw Olivia. We started caring for her the next day, until then she was in the nursery with just the nurses... Our L said the same thing, she needed to stay emotionally "detached" as much as possible to stick to her decision and get closure. It's so hard... I still want to meet her and hug her and tell her everything will be okay. I now just do that through my letter and photo updates... I've got everything crossed for you!! Can't wait to see pictures on FF of you and your precious little one!

Michelle

Anonymous said...

Oops! That was supposed to say Hi Jenn!